Love

1. "2 Can Play That Game" is a phrase we may have used often in life but here it is a title for another great hangover flick or a i need to rent something mindless flick. Set in LA the city of love?, Vivica A. Fox is a fox in late late 90s and early 00s gear. She narrates the movie which is all about how to deal with your man in all popular relationship situations but ultimately to keep him as yours. brush up on your lingo and give it a wirl.

2. STAYING ALIVE is a 70s 'sequel' to Saturday Night Fever and it is UNREAL. if you plan on having weed brownies this fall/winter season, please go and rent this movie before it all kicks in. but you don't need a buzz for this as you will be dying of laughter and the thing that'll leave you in question is John Travolta's sexuality. oh and HOW THE FUCK DID THIS MOVIE HAPPEN??P.S. it's not meant to be funny.

3. Jelly Babies…thank God they don't carry them here cause I'd be fucked. It is hands down on my top 5 for candies. and actually i discovered that they do sell there at Tutti Fruitty in Toronto but a bag costs $6.50 or some crazy shit like that…and that's enough for me to enjoy whenever they appear at every corner store…or start shoplifting again.

4. Yorkie chocolate bars..motherfuckers write on the package "Not For Girls" and they are right cause we'll eat them out of spite and then learn that they're fucking unreal and you know the rest.

5. Having friends who TWEET is great because every once and a while you can be charmed with 50cent tweets…

6. Montmartre, a dope as neighbourhood in Paris,'s market that happens every Saturday and Sunday on Rue . This market it 70% dope and 30% nope which is unheard of really in the market world, excluding food ones. If you go to Paris you must go and save your money for this market!! they have all finds of threads going down from linen/embroidered table cloths, fur, leather, jewelry, furniture, clothes of all finds, antiques, possible celebrity citing, amazing AMAZING coffee, and hotties of all types.

7. V&A aka the Victoria Albert Museum has one of the most insane jewelry collections your eyes will ever be able to comprehend. A quarrel beside me says to her bunk posy "Ya but like who would actually wear that…it's like so big and ridiculous, like" i was like i'll wear it now and be a walking fucking DIAMONDE BITCH!

8. Broadway Market= where scensters come to die aka come decked out in the dopiest daywear hoping to get snapped by StyleHunter. It is much much smaller than Boroughs market but again…empty stomach required and this includes coffee cause the coffee in london blows but not at the markets so SAVE THAT CUP! this market is next to the canal so when you're done staring at people who only stare back and never make a move, take a walk along the canal and imagine yourself living in one of the amazing lofts build alongside.

9. Boroughs Market= amazing AMAZING food market that feels like a movie. not as scent as broadway market but still some mega babe people watching. must must go on an empty stomach because you will be faced with the best of the best like an ONLY olive oil booth with bread for dipping or an ONLY oyster bar conveniently adjacent to the wine booth. you can plan a day in this area and cover great parts of london. start at the market, walk through it to the Tate Modern Gallery, walk over the bridge at the Tate and get a view of London bridge, St. Paul's Cathedral and beautiful architecture. you can walk over to St. Paul's no probe and take a step in and you'll see why people use to go to church just unbelievable beauTIFUL! then if you got up early and started the market in the am you can make your way back that way and pick up some last call items from the market for dinner, get a bottle and sit ANYWHERE. probably one of the cheapest day dates in London and you don't even need a date. k that last part was booshit it b way bettr obi. Oh and it happens every thursday to sunday and my internet is not working so i can't tell you exactly where it is but you can google dat shit.

10. Eurostar= London to Paris in 2.5 hours!

11. seeing Kris van Asche in the Monmartre market…ya.

12. White Russians

13. Versaille…if you go to Paris, you must take an entire day devoted to Versaille aka Marie Antoinette's ridiculous 16th Century palace. You need 8 ours because that is just how massive it is…you may not even cover all the grounds. i don't know how to describe the interiors in words beside the word breathtaking. and remember when this was built…just amazing as in amazing's original definition.

14. Jersey Shore (ya i'm late on this but i don't watch TV and i watched enough for the next 5 years in my London flat)

15. Ruth BartletT

16. 2 4 1 sunday roasts, a London tradition to have a roast dinner on Sundays. many of the pubs hold one and my favourite was at the Winchester on Essex Road. 2 4 1 before 9 and the drinks at this place are UNREAAAAAAAAL. enjoy.

17. arrivaderch to Eruo pounds in currency and Kilos gained!


Hate

1. Squirrels with B.A.D. hygien

2. Hunters, UGGs, Crocks, Lulus(out of gym), letters on bum of sweat(any)pants, chunky highlights(you know the kind), dudes who use straightners(espech if straight).

3. REMMEL the REal London look. So Kate looks real banging' in that commercial but it turns out that the real London look is quite bunchy. Aside from the food and beer making everyone white and pasty, i am more confused with people choosing to put on fake lashes for day instead of G EYE DONNO doing a load of laundry?? Perhaps I can't blame em for getting jarred right after work on beers, on an empty stomach=eating pub food…it's always fucking raining or looking like it's about to rain, that shit gets to you. fine. but please explain why you can see 96% dudes hanging in and out of a pub at 5pm with ZERO squirrels? what the fucking fuck. and you'd think that if you and your go's walk in for a pint that heads'll turn??fuck NO, unless you resemble a Jelly Baby and remind them of their midnight snack.

4. smoking, fucking gross

5. Tidy-ing is NOT cleaning, yup u no dis

6. Getting lost in the most whore/crack hood in Paris while wearing the most outrageous outfits…to be mistaken for a hoe who makes cash instead of crack.

7. Getting lost at Versaille is like getting lost at Versaille

8. gay (or straight) dudes trying (hard) to be fashionable- has zero style- and is in fashion.

9. to the cellphone driver trina hideir cell, hiding=more obvious

10. effing a squirrel or a toy in your gf/bf's bed is one thing but feeling the need to brag about the situation with a grin while claiming to love your partner is another level of classlessness. you wanted so badly to have your cake and eat it too but you just classlessnessed yourself bringing you to a level of shalienism. anyone who's a professional of carelessness would tell you that you don't go farting in anyone's ear about the tale. leave it to the pros.